I secretly always knew the day would come. The day the ‘curse’ of having three sons would fade away. Because genuinely, that’s how some people see it. A curse.
“Three boys! What a nightmare”
“ Oh I bet you’re demented”
“I’m so sad for you, to have a daughter is to have a best friend for life.”
These are all things which have been said to me. Sometimes by close friends and family members, often by complete strangers in Sainsbury’s. I’ve had no choice but to be defensive of my (undeniably feral) boys; which in turn usually rewards me with a pitying look which screams; “Oh bless her; she’s so touchy about it. She really wishes one of them was a girl.”
I thought the true beauty of having three boys might be revealed when they were handsome teenagers, hitting the town together. Or perhaps when they’re ‘best men’ at each others’ weddings… It turns out I didn’t have to wait that long!
Lockdown was all it took.
The joy of three scruffy boys who neither want nor need anything more than to be together, kicking a football, climbing trees, building dens, laughing loudly; it has been a beauty to behold.
They’ve allowed me masses of time to work because they are just happy being in each others company. Three weeks in; I haven’t heard ‘I’m bored’ once.
I’m sure those Mums of girls are having a great time too (although I hear whispers that there is a lot of crafting being done). I’m sure those much-lauded ‘one of each’ Mums are loving being at home with their children (although I hear whispers that their kids won’t play together and they’re desperately missing their school mates)... but I wouldn’t swap my terrible trio for the world and I take no pleasure in knowing some Mums are finding things trickier.
I hope when we come out of the other side of this people (especially fellow Mums) will be kinder to each other. Hopefully, we’ll value our little people for exactly what they are and celebrate each family’s individual dynamic, knowing how lucky we were to have had a family to be locked-down with at all.
Author credit: Sarah Hughes